True Forgiveness
Scripture:
Matthew 18 v 15-16: "Moreover if thy brother shall
trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if
he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee
take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses
every word may be established."
These are the words of Jesus Christ and need to be
examined more closely so that our dealings with fellow believers is correct in
His eyes. As forgiveness is so central to Christianity its important to get it
right.
When a Christian offends you, sins against you, defrauds
you, slanders you or undermines you, Jesus says meet that person alone and tell
him or her what has upset you. It gives the person an opportunity to explain or
be accountable for their actions.
If they are willing to admit their guilt and ask for
forgiveness then we must forgive them and keep the problem between yourselves.
No rehashing it with others endlessly and bringing condemnation on yourself.
If, however, they refuse to accept any guilt for
wrongdoing and are in denial, you should take one or two Christians with you so
that every word and argument can be verified. These others should decide who is
right or wrong.
If the guilty party is still unwilling to apologise and
even discontinue wrong behaviour, then they should be brought before the elders
and congregation of the Church. If he or she refuses to receive this discipline
then they should be expelled from the Church.
Jesus also told his disciples that if a person repented
and asked for forgiveness 70 x 7 times a day it was to be given if that person
was sincere. In other words our well of forgiveness should never run dry.
However, it is important that we do not forgive without
the person we are forgiving knowing about it. You can however forgive those who
have died as this releases you from pain they caused when they were alive.
When we get born again we forgive those who have offended
or hurt us. There will be some of those to whom the Lord will guide us to have
a written or verbal discussion along the lines stated above. Some people are
oblivious to the damage they have caused so your confronting them could be an
eye-opener for them and may even lead to their salvation.
In Mark 11 v 26 Jesus says that if we do not forgive then
neither will our Father in Heaven forgive our sins. This is very serious and so
we must learn to forgive to the extent God commands in His Word. He means what
He says so we must not treat this lightly.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, we have to be responsible
Christians with moral character as we grow in grace. Following Your lead in
correct forgiveness teaches us many values and virtues. If we have neglected
some of these please forgive us and lead us to put things right. In Jesus' name.
Amen.