Anger Management
Scripture: Ephesians 4 v 26:
"Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down
upon your wrath."
Titus 1 v 7: "For a bishop must be blameless, as the
steward of God; not selfwilled, not soon angry, not given to wine, no striker,
not given to filthy lucre."
For the record a bishop is a pastor or shepherd, not some
fancy office created by ambitious men. In the Bible there are no archbishops,
popes, pontiffs, cardinals, or
monseignors. The ministries in the Bible are Apostle, Prophet, Teacher, Pastor, Evangelist, Intercessor. All
are servants of God who follow the Lamb.
Anger is a common problem and could be the slow burn that
builds like a tsunami and can be just as devastating or, at the other end of
the scale, a quick outburst gone and forgotten in a minute. Just as devastating
to the recipient as it is 'closed never to be reopened and dealt with.'
In between there is a whole range of anger-related
scenarios like road rage; violent abuse; murderous anger; simmering anger that
flares like a grumbling volcano; to suppressed rage that eventually erupts like
a firework display or a bomb blast.
Paul speaks of being angry without sinning. This is a
holy, righteous anger like Jesus had against the scribes and Pharisees. He saw
their evil hearts under their religious costumes. When pushed He told them to
their face that they were evil. It caused Jesus to overthrow the tables of the
moneylenders at the Temple because they were making His Father's House a place
of merchandise. He still gets angry at
that today.
Paul also says we must sort out what is making us angry
on the same day if possible. Don't let the sun go down on your wrath. Do not
leave issues unresolved by bedtime. Keep short accounts of wrongs so that when
you do deal with the immediate problem, three months of unresolved grievances
don't get added to the pile.
Deal with one problem at a time in a calm and civilised
manner. Treat each other with respect and love. You are Christians and should
pray together to bring peace and understanding into your differences.
One of the root causes of anger is when your expectations
are not met. One of the best things Jesus has taught me is to have no
expectations at all. Don't expect gratitude, thanks, respect, reward, love or anything else. Then you will
not be disappointed when you don't get any. However if you do receive any kind
of blessing it is sheer joy. Live life in the neutral zone where you don't
expect to be obeyed, or people to just know what you need and give it. Then
there is no blame or guilt.
If you are paying for something that is not meeting the
promises of the salesperson, you have a right to complain and expect good
service. You can be angry at unfairness and injustice and protest against it.
But not with violence and vandalism.
It seems to me that road rage occurs when the driver has
bottled up anger against someone he cannot confront like his boss; his in-laws;
the government; or whoever has produced a lot of frustration in him. My father
had a road rage problem after the 2nd world war. He hated Germans. He took it
out on every VW Beetle (and there were many) that travelled on a road we were
on. It had to be overtaken. He would be
in a fury until that VW was behind him. Then he would be calm.
Road rage can be deadly and dangerous when you want to
take out your frustrations on a complete stranger who may have cut you off or
caused you to brake or swerve. It escalates out of control and then tragedy
strikes. You come to your senses and you have blood on your hands. The root of
bitterness fuels road rage, and if you mix in some alcohol there is zero self
control. So become a forgiver of
everyone that has hurt you. Uproot that bitterness and all its ugly fruit.
Don't drive in anger and frustration as it could kill somebody.
People who are involved in occult, witchcraft or
satanistic covens have a deep anger towards our God. They hate Him without a
reason. They hate Christians and persecute them. Their anger erupts in a cold
rage with hard cutting words and a malevolent look in their eyes.
I have been on the frontline with some of these and in
their rage they don't hear anything so I quote scripture at them. A long while
later I hear that scripture come out of their mouth! It goes in and bothers
them. While they are screaming take
Godly authority over that demon of rage and command it to be silent. Be
suitably surprised when the screamer suddenly calms down.
Anger against a mother can turn a man into a woman hating
abuser. If this is you then you need help from a pastor. You need to forgive
your mother and ask Jesus to remove any bad memories that kick in and cause you
to hurt your wife or other women. Maybe your father abused your mother and you
thought that was the way women should be treated. It is always wrong to harm
another person. Jesus said Turn the other cheek rather than strike back
James said in 4 v 7: Submit to God, resist the devil and
he will flee. Treat your anger, bitterness, frustrations, violence, alcoholism,
drug abuse or other anger producing problems to this perfect formula. First
submit yourself into God's hands, then say NO to the devil driving you, and
then he will stop harassing you. Try it. It works.